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When will they learn?

June 28, 2009

elegantcoupleThe Husband and I attended a wedding this weekend, where I wore the cutest dress I have ever worn in my entire life thanks to a sweet friend, and he wore a suit.  He came to pick me up from my mom’s, because she was incredibly wonderful (as she usually is) and watched the girls for us overnight, and I got butterflies when I saw him get out of the car with his shirt and tie on.  Yay for dress up occasions!

Now, let me just say that The Husband wearing a suit did not happen easily.  Until he drove up, I was expecting to see him in a polo and khakis.  Not that he doesn’t look incredibly handsome in whatever he decides to wear (and I only hate him a little for that), but The Husband in a suit… Ohhhh, him in a suit…

Anyway.

So he wore a suit.  And then we went to the wedding.  And there was a teensy bit of fussing from The Husband regarding wearing a suit, sitting through a wedding, and then I made the mistake of mentioning that there could be dancing at the reception.  Oops.  (He doesn’t drink and he doesn’t like dancing — and he says he’s not a Baptist!)

I want to ask a question — are most guys like this?  The complaining about dressing up ONCE IN A WHILE?  Attending a wedding ONCE IN A WHILE?  I mean, the ceremony itself only lasts maybe 45 minutes at the longest.  Is that really so awful?  Guys will sit and watch other guys on TV trying to put a little white ball in a little hole for HOURS, but asking them to sit through a wedding service is too much?  I officially psh that.  Heck, I thppttt that! 

I wonder if guys realize the benefits they could receive from just putting on that suit without complaining and sitting through the service.  Going to a reception without asking, “Are you ready to go?” a couple hundred times.  I mean, for me, a wedding is romantic — and I can’t be the only one who feels that way.  (C’mon.  Tell me!!)  It’s romantic, and it makes me think about my own wedding.  I remember coming down the aisle and locking eyes on The Husband and not being able to look away.  All the tears and sniffling… Not because I was crying, because I had a pretty bad cold, but I digress…

Do husbands not realize that all those silly girly froo-froo emotions can sometimes be parlayed into some fun times in the bedroom later?  Did they not get that memo?  Are we keeping that a secret from them?  I think we should tell them, because maybe we wouldn’t have to drag them along, they would just come willingly.  I’d kind of like that.  Am I violating a code if I let that secret out?

PSSSSST, hey husbands!  Attend a wedding with your wife, preferably without complaining, and you might get lucky that night!  Get dressed up without being begged, and you might get… Well, I don’t know what your favorite thing is, but your wife does, and she might remember that night!

Oh, and dancing.  SLOW DANCE WITH YOUR WIFE.  Seriously, it really isn’t even dancing, it’s holding each other and swaying.   There’s a reason it isn’t allowed in some churches!  It can be SEXY!  And if you’re married, you are totally allowed to be sexy with each other!  It’s not inappropriate!  In fact, it’s very, very appropriate!  I mean, keep it kind of PG-13, there are children around, but otherwise, go for it!

I hope I didn’t just let out some top secret information.  Oh, but if I’m going to spill the beans, I might as well let the guys know that chick flicks can sometimes have the same effect.  Especially if they don’t point out how utterly pointless the plot is and complain that the body count isn’t high enough.  Or say loudly at the end of the movie, “Are you crying?!”  Just a tip.

On the flip side… Sometimes we ladies talk about how clueless the guys are, right?  So why are we so surprised when they don’t figure things like this out on their own?  Duh.  Who’s clueless now?  (And, for the record, that light bulb just went off over my head as I was writing this, so I’m just as guilty.)

In short, for the husbands: Dress up + Dance + Don’t Whine About It = Happy, Quite Possibly Hot-For-You Wife.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. June 29, 2009 8:48 am

    Ah.. I LOVE dress up occasions. For us these occasions mean that Brett gets to wear his Dress Blues, and I get to shop for something formal! and yes… Brett in uniform, especially his Dress Blues (or a suit on those rare occasions) make my heart thump wildly! However, he is COMPLETELY aware of this, and enjoys dressing up for that reason alone.. hehe.. LUCKY ME! I do think, though, that most guys think dressing up is directly related to the ‘ball and chain’ idea of marriage and therefore usually abhor the idea…

  2. June 29, 2009 9:34 am

    I want to see pictures!!!! PLEASE tell me you took some! Also, you’re pretty smart. You math adds up. 🙂 That’s math even I can do!

  3. June 29, 2009 10:53 am

    Oh, I would love to see the cutest dress you ever wore. And I want to Amen and double the whole post….might even forward this to my hubby. I try to explain the whole concept once…when he opted out of yet another wedding and reception and even more recently at a formal affair where I wanted to join in the dancing and he asked if I was ready to leave. I don’t believe he will ever learn…but at least I am not alone. Kat

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