It’s Kearsie’s Fault September 29, 2009

She totally threw me by posting her Keyboard Confessions today!  I was all ready to blog, and every thing I think of is in list form now.  EVERY. THING.

Truth be told, I kind of like lists.  They’re easy peasy lemon squeezy.

So, because of KEARSIE, here are the random thoughts in my mind.  Well, and now, on this blog.

• I am addicted to strawberry-flavored gum.
• I’m actually not addicted to the gum, I’m just addicted to picking up strawberry-flavored gum while in the checkout line and buying it.
• I think I have three different types around the house right now.
• Quite often, it disappoints.
• I am already in planning mode for our anniversary in November.  It’s our seventh.  While I know seven years isn’t some great milestone, I still feel that this is a year to celebrate.  We haven’t killed each other, we have two beautiful girls, and we now have a home.  We are so going to party.
• The weekend we are looking at is also the same weekend that Celtic Thunder will be in concert.  They will be in concert in a venue that is maybe an hour from us.  I mentioned this to The Husband.  He was not as enthused as I would have hoped.
• I am considering sending him this post.  There are benefits to be had.
• If that doesn’t work, I am considering hypnosis.
• Of course, with my luck, I’ll do it wrong and I’ll see The Husband heading out to work wearing a kilt.
• Hmmmm…
• I feel like a rebel. 
• The nail polish on my fingernails is different than the nail polish on my toes.
• Pick up your jaw.
• I am seriously considering reading Twilight.
• Pick up your jaw.
• It isn’t because I’ve heard it’s a great book, though.  It’s because I’m the only one in my circle who hasn’t read it.
• They are also all excited about New Moon coming out.  A few of them are getting together to go see it.
• Wait.
• That’s the same weekend that The Husband and I will be doing something for our anniversary.
• I’m pretty sure I won’t be missing hanging out with my friends then.
• I’ve run out of thoughts.

Note to Self September 25, 2009

• You can love shopping, but does shopping love you back?
• Who cares?!  It was FUN!
• Gift cards are the best invention EVER.
• Well.  Cash is pretty cool too.
• You did not go to Kohl’s.
• When you think of Kohl’s now, the word sounds all dreamy. 
• Kooohhhhl’s.
• You may have a problem.
• The problem is easily remedied, though. 
• No money = no shopping.
• Now you’re depressed.
• Kooohhhhl’s. 
• Better now.

Happy Weekend!

Mommy Mode September 23, 2009

As much as I want to be more than mommy, sometimes all there is to me is Mommy.  And that’s okay, because that’s a huge part of who I am.  When the kiddos are sick, when The Husband is sick, I’m all about mi familia.  Wait, we are of German descent.  I’m all about meine familie.

Well, I’m all about me too.  I’ve been to the doctor for myself — twice, in seven days.  Once for the bronchitis.  Then for the g-doc.  And now I have to go to an endocrinologist, because apparently my thyroid is doing funny things.  I must be a freak of nature, because I have symptoms of hyperthyroidism, but the bloodwork showed an underactive thyroid, which is hypothyroidism.

And all that makes me think of is I’m a hyper-hypo!

I found time to read while the family was ill.  That’s what I had written about yesterday, that I was just reading, reading, reading.  No, not Twilight.  I still haven’t, and I think now I’m not just because everyone else has.  That’s the best rebellious act I can come up with.  Anyway, I read.  I went to the library and checked out three books.  One by an author that I’d read before and kind of liked, so I was giving her another chance.  The second by an author I knew I would like, but I also knew the book was going to be intense.  Then the third book was one I’d read before, but I wanted some comfort reading in case the first book sucked and the second book scared me.  All in all, it was good reading.

But other than doctor’s appointments and escaping quickly into some books, I’ve pretty much been into The Husband and the little ones.  And while, yes, that’s what I’m supposed to do, I’m also ready for a teensy break.  Everyone else got to rest while they were sick, you know?  Me?  I’m hoarse and talking like Kathleen Turner.  Because it is due largely to The Phlegm, it is decidedly unsexy.

Hopefully I will be better in a couple of days, when The Husband will be home to be Super Daddy to Li’l Bit, Big Sister will be in school, and I will go out and have some retail therapy.  And hopefully everyone will stay well, and my mind won’t be filled only with thoughts of alternating Tylenol and Motrin, phlegm, and poor pathetic loved ones curled up on couches or in beds awaiting their soup and grilled cheese sandwiches (because I make the best grilled cheese sandwiches, ever). 

Well, even then, my world will still mostly revolve around them.  But that doesn’t mean there isn’t still more to me than that.  But it does mean I know which part is more important.

Reading beat writing. September 22, 2009

Well.  That’s interesting.

There used to be a post here, but I published it, and now it’s gone.

My voice is also gone.

Maybe my voice and my writing are taking a vacation together.  Maybe they’ll send a postcard.

Note to Self September 18, 2009

• Everyone in your house is healthy.
• Physically, that is.  Mentally… That could be a different story.
• You weren’t acting all that sane as you wandered around earlier in the week muttering, In sickness and in health… In sickness and in health.
• It would be nice to be able to love more often in health, but you did marry a man whose screen name at one time had the word injury as part of it.
• Yeah.
• You can take comfort in the fact that most wives deal with whiny husbands when those husbands are sick.
• You love him bunches though.
• This made you laugh when you needed it the most.
• So did this.
• Great, now you want a drumstick.
• You’re also still wondering if you should just cave and read the Twilight books.
• If you do that, you might have to watch The Office too.
• Nah.  Just keep waiting for when Lost starts again.
• Dancing With The Stars starts up next week, you can watch that.
• Don’t tell anyone that you used to have a crush on Donny Osmond.
• Oops.
• That is really embarrassing.
• More embarrassing?  You are watching a video of him singing Soldier of Love on another screen.
• Of course, it’s kind of making you laugh.  Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la.
• And at least you aren’t watching him sing Sacred Emotion.  The line has to be drawn somewhere.
• Great, now you want a drumstick and you’ve got sha-la-la-la-la-la-la running through your head.
• Happy Friday!

Shhh! September 16, 2009

You can’t tell, but I’m whispering. 

I don’t want anyone to know I’m in here.

Illnesses have run rampant, and it’s caused my workload to increase.  First, I was working a little more often in childcare at church.  Then my own girls were sick.  Then I was sick.  Then The Husband got sick.  He is actually still sick.  He’s well enough to be out of the bed, though, and he is currently playing Pretty Pretty Princess with the eldest daughter while I type softly. 

I haven’t been in any mode other than mommy for a little bit now.  Even my Wife role has been transferred to a Nurse role — and I don’t mean that in any kind of sexy way, either.  Because phlegm ain’t sexy.  (The word itself doesn’t even look sexy.  Phlegm.  Yuck.)   I did have a few hours to myself last Friday… But that was because I was at the doctor’s office and then waiting 45 minutes for my prescription to be filled.  I also had some time to myself yesterday, but that was when I had my appointment with G-Doc.  (That’s short for Girl Doctor, which is to spare me from saying g-y-n-e-c-o-l-o-g-i-s-t.  Shhhh.) 

And tomorrow is Big Sister’s birthday.  She’ll be 6.  And yes, true to my mommy nature, I am totally reminiscing about what was going on 6 years ago today.  I am also thinking about how I looked 6 years ago.

You may be laughing, but that picture is pretty darn accurate.  That is what it looked like when I was pregnant and headed toward food.  It was like Moses parting the Red Sea.  And if I was hungry enough, there were probably also people screaming in terror.  

Here are some gems I heard while I was pregnant:

• Fatty Fatty, two-by-four.  (I read the rhyme that goes with that – it’s disgusting.  Had I known that then, I may have sat on the person.)
• Did you spend a little too much time in the buffet line?
• I heard that when a woman is pregnant with a girl, the baby steals the mother’s beauty.

Here are some other things you should never, EVER say to a pregnant woman:

• You must be about ready to pop!
• Oh my gosh, you still have another <insert # here> month(s)?
• That baby must be HUGE!
• Are you sure there’s only one in there?
• Should you really be eating that?

There.  Now you’re in the know, and less likely to have a very hormonal and heavier-than-usual woman burst into tears at a comment you’ve made, or sit on you because you’ve angered her.

That’s all I have for today, because my nails are kind of long and they’re making a lot of noise, what with the click-click-clicking against the keys.

And I’m hiding.  Shhhhh.

Note to Self September 10, 2009

• The flu stinks.
• Bronchitis stinks.
• Watching Big Sister and Li’l Bit suffer with the flu and bronchitis, respectively, stinks most of all.
• You were going to write sucks, but your mom would’ve cringed every time she read it.
• Because you never stop being a mom.
• And apparently, you can be a mom before you have kids.
• You found a note where people wrote nice things about you in Sunday school class one day.  Your mom-like qualities were mentioned more than once.
• You were not married and did not have children.
• Yeah.
• Maybe that just proves you’re doing what you were meant to be doing.
• It is harder than you thought.
• It is also way more rewarding than you ever imagined.
• There’s still more to you than mommy, yes.
• But the mommy part is pretty sweet.

Football Widow (2nd Down) September 5, 2009

I figured it out!

Okay, so I stand by my previous post.  I understand that many (not all, but many) women (including me) may not understand the fascination with the sport (whichever sport it is, really), but we can appreciate that it’s your thing.  And yes, we can use it to connect with you.  I still believe in that wholeheartedly.  Okay?  Okay.

However (yeah, that’s a fancy but), it’s not just the games.  If it were just the games, that might not be so bad.

But, fellow widows, it isn’t just the games, is it? 

No.  Because there are highlight reels to watch.  (How many of you sports widows have developed a twitch when the theme for SportsCenter comes on?)  Commentators to agree with or yell at.  Message boards to post on. 

And.  It isn’t just the day after the game, nooooo!  It’s all throughout the week!  The first half of the week, they’ve got to watch all about what happened in the game that’s done and over with, then the second half they’re conjecturing on the outcome of the upcoming weekend’s game!

Hmmmm…  Let me get real for a second though… I know I get into American Idol and The Bachelor/Bachelorette.  I have blogged about both of those in the past… I have vocalized my opinion to the screen during broadcasts of both.  I visited one other blog that would discuss American Idol, and I would sometimes comment on it. 

And if I remember this last season of American Idol accurately, judging from Facebook statuses, people were pretty passionate about that…

Hmph.  I was all excited about my revelation when I started this.

Of course, being fair to myself (sometimes I gotta do it), I did not spend a great deal of time watching E! or checking out people.com to find out the latest info on my shows.  I will admit to checking out an article if it was on my homepage, or if someone linked to it, but I didn’t really seek it out…

And really, the passion that a fan has for his/her team, from what I have seen, is quite different than the passion a fan has for American Idol (unless it’s the girl they show during this clip).  The conversations are way more intense between two guys discussing their teams’ stats than two people discussing Jillian’s dates with Kiptyn and Ed.

And I’ve never heard a story about an object being thrown or a piece of furniture being harmed during one of Simon’s critiques.  The same cannot be said when referencing an opposing team’s touchdown.

So.  I guess it ends up just depending on the particular level of fandom found in your home.

Now you’ll have to excuse me.  The Husband has stopped watching the college game to come in here to check the score of the baseball game…

Note to Self September 4, 2009

• Are you ready for some footbaaaaaaall??
• No?  Tough.
• Be supportive.  GO DOLPHINS!  GO GATORS!  GO PHILLIES!
• Wait, that last one was baseball.  But they’re still playing, and they are currently eight and a half games ahead in their division.
• Do you realize that you understand what it means to be “eight and a half games ahead”?  Figure out if this is a good or a bad thing. 
• You also understand that they are eight and a half games ahead in their division.  Ideally, of course, you want them to have the best record in the conference so they can have home field advantage, but it’s still good.
• Find out how many people figured out that you called The Husband for that information.  Although you did know that they were ahead, you just thought they were only seven games ahead because of the win column.
• Your note to self is making you sleepy.  Very sleeeepy.
• Talk about something else, quick!
• SEX!
• Thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more.
• Treat yourself to one and a half Oreos.
• IT’S A THREE DAY WEEKEND!

Enjoy the holiday!

It’s always more fun… September 3, 2009

… to share with everyone!  (From “The Sharing Song” by Jack Johnson.)

So Miss Kim bestowed me with this dandy little award, and to truly earn it, I am supposed to tell you three things about myself.   Here’s my dilemma… What haven’t I told you already, really?  Oh well, nobody said it had to be three new things about myself, did they?

1.  I’ve started checking out MyLifeIsAverage lately.  Have you seen it?  I am pretty sure many of the posts are from high schoolers or college students, but I don’t mind that as long as they keep making me laugh.  Don’t want to click it?  Here’s a sample: Today I went to dinner with my wife. After we had finished, we held hands and looked deeply into each other’s eyes, and drew the attention of other couples in the restaurant. Little do they know we were thumb wrestling. I love my wife. MLIA. (#436367)  (And, because of this site, I’ve also had a few giggles at AverageCats and Not Always Right.) 

2.  I found another not-brown hair.  It wasn’t really grey, it was really white.  I yanked that sucker out.  I don’t know which fear is greater — the fear of going grey or the fear of having to pay for the maintenance to not look like I’m going grey.

3.  I am now getting up at the buttcrack of dawn to walk three times a week.  I hope to make it five times a week eventually, but I’m starting off slowly.  On my street, there have been two black vans parked in front of two different houses for a while, and I realized that I have probably watched too much TV in my life, because I thought that a) it was a stakeout, or b) someone was going to jump out of the van as I was walking by, put a bag over my head and yank me into the vehicle and drive away.  Then The Husband would get a call asking for a ransom, even though I told them that they had the wrong family, we don’t have $5 million!  Then they would put me in a warehouse where I would sit and cry, and then slowly befriend one of my captors.  Then I would find a soft spot in his heart, and convince him to turn on his gang!  And he would release me!  And I would run until I came to some random diner and tell them, “I was kidnapped!”  And the police would be called, and the gang would be caught!  (But my friend the captor would end up getting a shorter sentence because he helped me.)  And then The Husband and My Girls would be brought to wherever I was, and we would all hug and cry, me in my blanket provided by the paramedics even though I told them I was okay, The Husband all concerned, fighting back the tears.  Then the next morning, I would walk again.  Oh yes.  I would walk again.

Now, for three people to tell us three things about themselves:

Mommy’s Heart
Hoping against all hopes that she’ll at least do this, The Funny Sister.
And a blog I’ve started reading and enjoying, Art’s Chili.